Repressed Homosexual Cop Threatens LGBTQ Community With Execution. In a Church. As its Pastor.
If you’re a person who feels immense rage due to having to coexist with the LGBTQ community, due to their insistence of living on Earth, I’m here to help you!
No, really. I’m sorry that this upsets you. I understand your dilemma. You hate gay people. Because you’re gay. You’re very angry they’re always tempting you with their sexy gay-stuff.
You see, people who are comfortable in their own sexuality rarely call for, or plan, the mass execution and genocide of the entire LGBTQ community.
For example, I’m a straight man and that totally works for me. Thus, I never run around in a rage like a maniac screaming about killing LGBTQ people. I don’t obsess on them. They don’t upset me in any way. I’m upset by their plight because I’m a sensible human being who understands that the word consenting when combined with the word adults always equals no one else’s business. Here, I’ll even give you a ‘Good Will Hunting’ styled mathematical equation.
C+A = NEB
So, let’s take a whimsical journey examining Grayson Fritts. He’s what the medical community refers to as “A Silly Goose, But One That’s Also Heavily Armed”.
Pictured above. (L) Not the face of a crazy, armed, man. (R) Not the face of a crazy, armed, man pretending to be casually holding another man’s penis.
Grayson Fritts is an officer of the law in Tennessee due to a very stringent hiring process at the Knox County Sheriffs Office where they determine, through much diligent testing, that accepted applicants are white, and insane, and filled to the brim with ‘roid-rage, before giving them guns.
Grayson Fritts is ALSO a preacher. He’s really into GOD. Not,… you know, Regular-GOD, the entity many of the rest of us picture as a wise and benevolent creator, but instead, Angry-Murder-GOD who only invented LGBTQ people (and creates millions more of them per day), just so that they can all be hunted for sport.
So, Grayson Fritts created the ‘All Scripture Baptist Church’ in Knoxville because the name — ‘Murder Blood Raining Body Organs & The Church of Latter-Day Psychopaths’- didn’t look good on their stationary.
His flock consists of about 16 people which is a nice Manson-Family number. Not so many that they’ll get in each other’s way when their murder sprees begin, and yet enough to still decimate the population.
And thus, as head of Tennessee’s law enforcement’s exciting new Enthusiastically Promoting Homicide Division, Officer Grayson Fritts gave a sermon. Holding a specially modified bible, Grayson the Heavily Armed Pastor waxed poetic about killing LGBTQ people and using his status as a completely unhinged policeman to help round them up!
Isn’t that FUN?
Here are the spiritual musings of Pastor Grayson. He said this. Verbatim. With his mouth!
“God has instilled the power of civil government to send the police in 2019 out to the LGBT freaks and arrest them and have a trial for them, and if they are convicted, then they are to be put to death,”.
GOD immediately responded:
“Wait, WHAT? Oh, I didn’t do ANY of that! Thau hast been watching too much FOX News and thus thy brain hath turned into tapioca, so sayeth me, you very silly man!”
Grayson Fritts duly ignored this and continued.
“God said homosexuality should be punished with the death penalty, as set forth in Leviticus 20:13. No homosexual will be allowed to attend or join All Scripture Baptist Church.”
Sobering thoughts, indeed… but, see what I mean? Grayson Fritts with a bible is exactly like Charles Manson listening to the Beatles’ White Album and having his very own strange interpretations that later prove unfortunate to others.
It’s also hilarious how right-wing “religious people” intent on making a mockery of religion, will gloss over and ignore any sections of the Bible that can’t be twisted into promoting the mass murder of others. Here’s something from Leviticus that Mr. / Pastor / Officer Fritts can put into his MAGA* hat, (*a red hat made in China that protects people’s brains from receiving air). THIS is how the Bible and Leviticus say we should treat immigrants.
The foreigners residing among you must be treated as native-born. Love them as yourself, for you were foreigners in Egypt. I am the Lord your God. — Leviticus 19:34
And, as a follow-up, here’s a quote from Jesus.
‘ For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, — Jesus
(©0029 all rights reserved / Teachings-of-Jesus-people-choose-to-ignore-LTD)
So, following those biblical guidelines — America stole a bunch of migrant children by ripping them screaming from the arms of their parents, lost tons of them, and put the rest in cages under horrifically cruel and unsanitary conditions that violate all the terms of the Geneva Convention. — Oh, I do see why the evangelical right enjoys the work of Donald Trump and the Republican party. They know it’s exactly the opposite of what GOD actually wants, which makes it KINKY for them. It’s the golden-calf story all over again except calves have far more dignity and give off far less gas.
Oh, and let’s add that recently a humanitarian aid volunteer named Scott Warren, was put on trial and almost went to prison for giving water and food to migrant people who were dying of starvation and dehydration. So, take THAT, Jesus! You hippy!
Now, let’s continue examining genocide-enthusiast Pastor Grayson’s message of love and hope. There was more. He wasn’t done…
Officer / Pastor Grayson Fritts, took a moment to not think about other men’s penises, collected his few non-penis related thoughts, and he then seamlessly blended his homicidal religious beliefs with his authority as an officer sworn to uphold the law and protect his citizens. As such, here are Mr. Fritts’ plans for the LGBTQ community. Please note for historical accuracy that he was absolutely rock-hard when he said this.
“We have a bunch of them we’re going to get convicted because they have all their pride junk on, and they’re professing what they are, that they’re a filthy animal,”
This is all going on in a church, mind you…
It does remind me of all the times when Jesus said:
“Kill those motherf***ers! Kill everyone! Be horrible to strangers and minorities too! Anyone who’s different! Filthy animals! Oh, you guys should invent a hand-held machine that kills lots of people in a second with projectiles, and then absolutely refuse to regulate it in any way! That would be awesome! Blessed be the mass murderers and people who clench and unclench their fists with rage and anger!”
Okay, that was satire. Jesus didn’t say that. I thought I’d clear that up.
Fritts’ holy sermon continued from his hole-filled head.
“I’m sick of sodomy getting crammed down our throats,” Fritts said at one point in his sermon, “It’s infecting our culture, people!” he continued. —
So, allow me to translate what he said back to his thoughts and inner monologue. He’s saying he’s sick of things that he’s very, very, attracted to ‘being crammed down his throat’ (despite him always hanging around rest-stop bathrooms and asking strange men to cram things down his throat) and that he’s also upset that he, somehow, ‘got infected with gay’.
And now the LGBTQ community in Knox County can rest assured that a crazy, armed, policeman, plans to convict them of being LGBTQ and then sentence them to death because he thinks that’s what GOD wants… so, I guess… dress accordingly?
And now, let’s go from the very sane law enforcement mechanisms of Tennessee over to that magical, wondrous, enchanted, land we call Alabama! Oh, it’s a place where anyone can run for Senate like Roy Moore did, despite how much pedophilia they commit. A place where rapists are now granted visitation rights to their horrified victims and offspring. The new Alabama anti-abortion law promises that women who want to abort a fetus due to rape or incest be given a choice as to whether to be kicked in the stomach and hurled down a flight of stairs, or simply opt to be burned as a witch.
And, if you’re a maniac you can even become a mayor, like Carbon Hill Mayor, Mark Chambers. He’s an elected official whose job it is to look after the interests of all his constituents. Here’s what he stated about the LGBTQ community.
“The only way to change it would be to kill the problem out. I know it’s bad to say but without killing them out there’s no way to fix it.”
— Mark Chambers, Carbon Hill Mayor.
In fairness, Mark Chambers, the Mayor of Carbon Hill Alabama, did also say we need to wipe out and murder all SOCIALISTS too, (such as anyone on food stamps, social security, Medicaid, Medicare, unemployment insurance, and other such NASTY socialist things…)
He also included in his mayoral “fix it” plan the need to kill women who have had abortions because, you know,… life is precious!
The first thing we need to discuss about this amazing event is:
Have you SEEN Carbon Hill Mayor Mark Chambers?
I need to yell this next part.
HE LOOKS LIKE THE MUGSHOT OF THE GUY WHO STOLE EVERYONE ELSE’S BLOOD-PRESSURE!
Here is a photo of what carbon-based people who live on a hill duly elected as the Mayor of Carbon Hill. Mark “Mr. Pink” Chambers.
FUN FACT: If you don’t wash him and the shirt in cold water, the colors will bleed. Inside of his head.
Mark Chambers wants to kill all gays and he also turns bright red when he thinks of other men’s sexy parts, sort of like the way the Hulk turns green but with far more homoeroticism.
He’s like Attack of the Killer Homophobic Tomatoes!
Here’s another photo of Carbon Hill Mayor, Mark Chambers, killing some LGBTQ people at a local beach.
True Christians who follow the words and teachings of Jesus Christ are duly appalled and horrified by the blasphemy of murder enthusiasts Grayson Fritts and Mark Chambers. Those on the evangelical right who support Trump and the Republican Party’s regime of vipers go against everything Jesus ever spoke of, and all of his teachings.
There is so much hate all around us now. It’s in the air we used to be able to breathe, and in the water we used to be able to drink. To deny people love is a sin.
To threaten to murder them is also a sin.
Written by Steven W. Rouach