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Jewish People Officially Apologize for Space-Lasers Burning CA. “Oy Vey! We Didn’t Know It Would Cause Such Tsuris and Shpilkes!”, Says Local Jew.
Marjorie Taylor Greene, Noted Expert On Space Lasers, Responds by Creating New Legislation to Help Her Harass & Torment PTSD School Shooting Survivors.
It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I, as a Jewish man, remember hearing about it one day at the Kosher butcher on East 3rd and Avenue U, from Rabbi Lenny Kravitz. Here’s that exchange.
“Did you hear? Chaim launched a Space Laser! Shlomo helped him! Then, they went to Katz’s delicatessen but it’s NOT like it used to be! I thought you should know this! Also, my new album will be released in September followed by a tour! Now, I’m off to have a bagel with a shmear and play some guitar!” — Rabbi Lenny Kravitz.
Inspiring words, indeed.
So, apparently, we as Jewish people collectively decided to launch a Space Laser, so that the next time we all have to flee for our lives, we can cook Matzoh from space. This happens every 70 years or so, thus we figured we’d take the precaution.
